September 7, 2020 – Self-compassion is a phrase we hear often, yet what does it really mean? Merriam-Webster defines compassion as “sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress together with a desire to alleviate it.” Kristin Neff has studied self-compassion and wrote an essay “Why Self-Compassion Surpasses Self-Esteem.” Neff describes three elements of self-compassion.
First, self-compassion is being aware of our own suffering without judging ourselves. You treat yourself with kindness and compassion whenever you are faced with shortcomings, failures, disappointments, or pain. You choose self-kindness over self-judgement.
Second, self-compassion recognizes that humans share common experiences, e.g. suffering, disappointment, and making mistakes. We don’t need to isolate or take on shame because everyone shares these experiences.
Third, self-compassion goes beyond accepting what we are experiencing and embraces the experiencer (you and me) with warmth and tenderness. Self-compassion uses mindfulness to recognize negative thoughts and feelings without getting stuck in them.
How will you practice self-compassion this week?
— Janet Leatherwood, CNO
Leave a Reply